Should I pen this down?

This question budges me a lot. Atleast when it’s about my feelings. I feel afraid that maybe someone will find that diary or piece of paper then I’m busted.

I will confront all those feelings in this one. Though only vaguely. But yes let’s give it a try.

There are times when I feel like I’m the best, I’m better than most. Then there are times I feel like a dumbass who has an insanely high opinion about himself.

At times I feel like I’m being arrogant. Sometimes I feel my self respect being threatened. I don’t know the line between them. I really don’t.

Sympathy is what I feel when someone is unjustly being made to suffer.

I feel Love for my people. Hate for a some.

Anger for myself not doing/trying enough. Hopelessness when the tide is against me.

Loneliness when I have so many around but I don’t feel like sharing my issues with them. Because obviously they must be having their own. So I keep it to myself.

But every now and then, I feel blessed. For the family I got, for the people who care, for having the resources to function without restraint.

Ahhh I think I would go on because thats the issue, there is so much I feel but these are mere words. They won’t do justice. But well it was worth a try. Wasn’t it?

-ChoubeySahab